As a parent it may seem overwhelming or scary to talk about sex, and sexuality with your children and/or teens.  It may be comforting to know that you never have to have “the talk”, just lots of little conversations along the developmental highway.  It is never to early to start talking to your children about the subject of sexuality, so be prepared when the next great opportunity to talk presents its self.

What are these great opportunities?  Well the most obvious is when you are asked a question about the topic.  This is a chance to show your child that they can ask you anything, and that you will give them an honest answer.  For example:  if your child (boy) asks why do you(adult male) have hair on your chest, and I don’t, you can tell them that this is something that happens as you grow older and develop into an adult.  You can tell them more depending on their age and level of interest.

That was an easy example used to illustrate the point that there are opportunities for little conversations everywhere.  As kids get older and turn into teens it may seem more difficult to get through, but they are still listening and they still want your feedback and your listening ears.  With teens it might be easier to get them to talk if you ask them about their friends and/or the media.

An example for a teen might be asking if any of their friends are dating or if their friends like anyone.  You can also use TV and songs as a great intro into a conversation.  Watch TV with them, and ask what they think about the decisions that characters in the show make.  This is a great time to let your teen know what your values are.

Try to find opportunities everyday to talk to your kids about the things that matter most.  There are so many important values and ideas you want to pass on to your children, and this is especially true when it comes to sex and sexuality.  Try writing down the top 20 things your want to make sure they know, and then look at the list to see if you have already covered it with them.  You are your child’s primary sexuality educator so take advantage of the fact that they are looking to you for answers.  The sooner the better!